and we're off, for an awesome awesome weekend... :-D

i love nathan capps. for real. we have a history. we could write a book of our history. just ask. we've been discussing it for the last 45 minutes or so. i miss that kid. ok i'm done now. i really need to study for psych... blah.

24 hours from now, me and ali will be in columbus. with michelle. YAYAYAYAY!!!!!!!!!!!

I'M...GOING...TO...SEE...MICHELLE...THIS...WEEKEND...WITH...MY...ALI...
I'M...EXCITED!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! :-D :-D :-D :-D :-D

i'm.going.to.cry.if.my.mom.says.that.i.can't.go.see.michelle.this.weekend.with.ali.

homestarruner
i have to pee
i'm hungry
ox has never seen homestarrunner
ali is a slacker
kelli doesn't know who aretha franklin is
i got free coffee
and
it didn't go away

i just IMed that to reno. and then decided it made a fun poem-type thingy.... haha

"Gandalf's Back"
To the tune of "Backstreet's Back"

Gandalf:
Fellowship, (yeah)
What a bad trip (yeah)
fellowship
I am your white knight
Gandalf's back, alright

Hey, yeah
Oh my Gods, I'm back again
Dwarves and hobbits, everybody sing
Gonna bring the whiteness, show you how
Gotta question for me better ask it now, yeah

Pippin: Are you the original?
Gandalf: Yeah
Merry: Are you the same one?
Gandalf: Yeah
Legolas: Are you actual?
Gandalf: Yeah
Aragorn: If you're going to help me, you better cut that lighting now

Gandalf:
Fellowship, (yeah)
What a bad trip (yeah)
fellowship
I am your white knight
Gandalf's back, alright
Alright

The balrog's whip was quite a shock.
I smote his ruins upon the rocks
So you thought I'd died there when I fell,
But I got it goin' on again
Yeah

Pippin: Are you the original?
Gandalf: Yeah
Merry: Are you the same one?
Gandalf: Yeah
Legolas: Are you actual?
Gandalf: Yeah
Aragorn: If you're going to help me, you better cut that lighting now

Gandalf:
Fellowship, (yeah)
What a bad trip (yeah)
fellowship
I am your white knight
Gandalf's back, alright
Alright

So every hobbit, everywhere
Don't be afraid, don't have no fear
We're gonna help the world, make it safe again,
As long as we are living, we will try to stop the ring

Fellowship, (yeah)
Had such a bad trip, (yeah)
Fellowship
I am your white knight (our white knight)
Gandalf's back
Fellowship (fellowship)
Yeah (such a bad trip)
Was such a bad trip (fellowship)
Yeah (fellowship had such a bad trip)
Fellowship (fellowship, bad bad trip)
I am your white knight (fellowship)
Gandalf's back, alright!

found this on a disturbing website

i don't know why, but this is one of my favorite songs. i like it a lot. its beautiful.


Glycerine by Bush
It must be your skin that I'm sinking in
It must be for real 'cause now I can feel
And I didn't mind
It's not my kind, it's not my time to wonder why
Everything gone white
Everything's grey
Now you're here Now you're away
I don't want this
Remember that
I'll never forget where you're at

Don't let the days go by
Glycerine Glycerine

I'm never alone
I'm alone all the time
Are you at one, or do you lie
We live in a wheel where everyone steals
But when we rise it's like strawberry fields
I treated you bad, you bruise my face
i couldn't love you more you've got a beautiful taste

Don't let the days go by
Could've been easier on you
I couldn't change though I wanted to
It should have been easier by three
Our old friend fear and you and me
Glycerine Glycerine

Don't let the days go by
Glycerine
Don't let the days go by....
Glycerine Glycerine
Glycerine Glycerine

Bad moon white again
Bad moon white again
As she falls around me
I needed you more when you wanted us less
I could not kiss, just regress
It might just be clear simple and plain
Well that's just fine that's just one of my names

Don't let the days go by
It could've been easier on you you you
Glycerine, Glycerine, Glycerine, Glycerine

again, if you want to hear it lemme know, i'll IM it to you. i'm relientkbandgeek.

i miss lisa today. i wonder what college she would have gone to. probly YSU like the rest of our class. :) i don't even know what she wanted to do. did she know yet? she could act. and draw. she would have made a good teacher i think.

last night was much fun. i love my friends a lot. well yesterday in general was fun.

we worked on little saint's stuff all day long. i made a wal-mart/dollar general/dollar general/marc's/dollar general/dumpster diving run with chelsie, which was fun. i hadn't talked to her much before. we were gone for a long time. but it was cool. i found out that she's neighbors with josh rettig. thats so weird! i find it amusing that i have to come an hour away from home to meet people that live so close to me! i wonder if lynne ever met her? anyway. we listened to dashboard. there's a couple other girls in our hall that like dashboard. so thats exciting!! :)
anyway. we got all our decorating done around 6 or so, probly. and it looked freaking awesome!!! our end of the hall was done like a pirate ship, with cardboard on the walls painted to look like the side of a ship, and nets from the ceiling with jewelry in them, and a treasure map, and good stuff like that. then the middle of the hall was blocked off, and we made it so that you had to "walk the plank" to get to the other end of the hall. and on that side, they were underwater with a bubble machine and blue paper covering the lights, fish, mermaids, and a treasure chest with candy. awesome stuff like that. our hall was awesome!!! we had a plank, and a bubble machine, and roberta had a peg leg! and we SO got screwed. 2nd place??? what the crap is that???? oh well....
while we were decorating, kristen and i decided that ali and ox should come, so i called ali and after confusing her, lol, she said she'd call kelli and ox. so they hung out in our hall for awhile last night. that was so much fun. after little saints was over and we'd torn down everything, i sat out in the hallway with ali, kelli, ox, and reno. they made random grafiti (sp??) for my wall. which was exciting. i hung them up. but i'm out of sticky tack now. i need some more so i can finish putting up my pictures.

ok i'm gonna go write some more of my english paper so i can go to b/s and starbucks with a clear conscience tonight... lol

do my survey thingy down below!!! please!!!!!!!!

"i'm so glad that i snore like that!!!!"
-caryn

this is very randomly stolen from someone's xanga that kelli my kelli subsribes to.... lol

is anybody out there?

if so, leave me comments and fill this out.

+what is my name?
+what is your first memory of me:
+how long have we been friends:
+tell about one memory we share together:
+describe me in four adjectives:
+if we could spend a day together what would we do:
+name one thing you really like about me:
+if you could give me a gift what would it be:
+have we ever hugged:
+what is something embarrassing that i've done:
+what do i usually look like when you see me:
+when have i helped you:
+what do i say all the time:
+do you think we will be friends in 5 years:
+what do you admire about me:
+has there been anything you wanted to tell me, but didn't:
+what advice would you give me, in general:
+suggest a band / cd for me to listen to:
+is there a song that reminds you of me:
+what will i be doing later in life:

seriously guys, do this!!! its fun!!! or at least it will be for me!!!! :-D

"my butt was falling asleep."
-reno
"oh i hate that, then its up all night!!!"
-ox

so in case you hadn't noticed, i changed the link to this. its now http://iamtracey.blogspot.com. and there is a reason for that: my mom. she'd been reading my weblog. how much does that suck????? so i changed the link. now she'll just think that i stopped updating my weblog, while all you smart people will know better. :) not that my moms not smart. i just don't really want her reading this stuff...

"they didn't show it. she just woke up naked."
-caryn

"i woke up and i was kissing the wall!!"
-caryn

*yawn* i shouldn't be tired. but i am. i got like 8 and a half hours of sleep last night. thats a lot of sleep. and it was in my bed!!!! but it wasn't the same, cuz my comfy foam mattress was here in my dorm room, so my bed at home wasn't comfy..... but it was still my bed!! :)

i got home at like 5, played with my doggy, then did basically nothing until like 6:30. i stopped in at mcdonads to see people and pick up my paycheck from like 2 months ago, but i only recognized like two people there, not counting managers. i was so confused....and sad... :( lol. but i got my paycheck, and thats happy. :) brit merriman wanted me to come home tomorrow night for her halloween party, but i'm not going to. tomorrow is little saints!!! yay for decorating our hall and dressing up and giving candy to kids!!! :) but anyway. i went to the football field after that. i had to park out in the middle of nowhere, but all well. i went in and talked to some band people. then i went on a christy hunt. she saw me coming, so i didn't get to jump on her like i wanted (and this calls for a farrah face). XD then we went to find casey. yay for friends!!!! it was so much fun to hang out with those two!!! i haven't seen them in waaaay too long!!!!! like since july or august or something. i talked to jordan posey for awhile. that kid is awesome. every time i see him, we just sorta pick up where we left off and i forget that i haven't seen him for months. i lost christy during 3rd quarter, but i ended up sitting with fun people from my church!! i ran into pastor jan, and after talking to him for awhile i asked him how will, bj, and the girls were, so he took me over to where will and bj were sitting. it was like the little columbiana nazarene "place to be". there were a lot of people from church sitting over there. so between pastor jan and will, they convinced me to come home next weekend since i haven't been at church since august (not because i haven't been going to church, i just hadn't been home since then). will said jeremiah will be home next weekend, so that should be fun stuff. :) i'm also gonna hang out with casey till 4 on saturday and christy after 4 on saturday. stupid work schedules!!! lol. christy and i went to PH after the game (i think it was only like the 3rd time i've ever gone to ph after a football game.. lol). staci was there, and sue was home from st. mary's for the weekend, so it was fun to see them. its so....refreshing? if thats the right word? to be with people who have known me for a long time and are totally used to the way that i act. staci's dating eric westfall, and thats cute. he and cj price ate dinner with us. i'm really out of leetonia gossip. cj and amanda are broken up, and amanda is dating shawn ryan... man am i out of it!!! oh! some columbiana people were there, including laurie and jordan. jordan took me for a spin in his mini cooper. that was fun. i think he should drive his mini cooper over here to malone to see me!!! lol. after PH i went over to christy's house cuz i had to meet charlie, the newest addition to their family! :) he's so cute!!! his little floppy ears and tail and he's just so cute!!! awww!! puppy!!!!!! lol. i got home around 12:30, and in bed around 1. i got up at 9:40 or so, did some of my laundry, and tim and i watched my senior dvd. it made me miss people. like tkach, derek, esenwein, even patrick!! i used to see those guys (with the exception of esenwein cuz he quit) not only in school every day, but then almost every night cuz of work. they definitely kept me entertained. :) i didn't see tkach. i don't think he was at the game. but i definitely wanna see him and ash next weekend!!!! i miss them!!!! ok i've said that i miss people enough now... lol. i got back here around 1:15, and now i'm at work. my car is still full of stuff, cuz i didn't have time to take it out. and i have to go to alliance later tonight to meet my mom and get all the things that i left at home... lol. my fingers are cold and don't want to type any more. so i'm done for now. this is like a freaking book, its so long!! lol

blah blah blah.

i worked 3:30-6:30, went and watched MY ali play some powderpuff FB, then went to applebee's for dinner with ali, kelli, ox, doug, shannon, tj, and donny. that was fun. i like those people. they crack me up. i needed cracking up tonight.
ali kelli and ox went to walmart, but i wanted to get back here. so i didn't go to walmart. i got back just as celebration was ending, of course. i missed my first celebration. thats sad. thats the start of the crappy part of my night.
so i get back to my room and theres a note on the door from caryn's friend jami, telling us that she left us brownies. i was like awwww thats nice. but then i get into my room she'd left the brownies wrapped in tin foil ON THE FLOOR!!! so needless to say, there were ants everywhere. millions of tiny little ants. so i spent a good 10 minutes taking care of that.
then i realized that my swelling-ness on my was even bigger than before, so i went on a benadryl hunt. dani, the RA for the other half of my floor, had a lotion/cream kind. so we used that.
so i get back here and reno's still not in his room. i IMed mike to find out if he was there, and he was. reno used mikes screenname for a sec, made fun of me for my crappy night, then hurried off to bed. i know he wasn't trying to be mean, but the mood i was in made the whole thing worse. everything that i'd been holding in for the last 3 months or so just came pouring out, and i just sat here at my computer and bawled my eyes out. i miss heidi. i miss being around people that know me. i miss being able to call heidi when i need to talk-more importantly, when i need to cry. i couldn't stand being in this little room anymore, it was starting to feel clausterphobic. so i went out for a walk. i went out to that little white gazebo, sat down, and just bawled and bawled. after 10 or 15 minutes, i started freezing, so i came back in. i dunno... i seriously think that something is wrong with me. i shouldn't feel the way i do, but i do. i feel crummy almost all the time. and no one can understand that like heidi can. i'm not gonna make it with her so far away. i just can't do it.

just a random thought.... is it normal to feel so lonely when i'm surrounded by people?? theres a ton of people that i could call right now (well if i weren't at work, anyway) and they'd be like "yeah! lets hang out!" and yet, i still feel like i'm alone. i don't know. i think there's something wrong with me.

english was cancelled today!!!!! oh wait. i'm up anyway. thats right... BLAH!!! sleep is good. but esther, chelsie, and charity crack me up. so even tho i didn't sleep that well on the hard floor, it was still hilarious. who else would just lay there and rhyme for awhile? chelsea even helped me study for a bit... speaking of studying. its the devil. i'm going back to it now....

reno...i know you don't think i suck. i'm just a jerk!!!! i'm sorry :(

"christians don't sue people."
-caryn
"christians don't throw christians computers out the window!!!"
-me