quick update for the rest of today so i don't have to try to remember it on sunday...

intro to swk was ok. i didn't pay attention much, cuz i realized right before that class that i had a quiz in ASL, so i was reading for that.
in ASL we just took our quizzes and left, which was amazing.
then i got an amazing chain letter in the mail. :)
then around 1 i went to sheetz for lunch with mike davis, reno, lyle, and jana. it was a good time. i bought davis' lunch, so i finally don't owe him sheetz anymore, lol.
then i just hung out around here.
i went to borders/got my prescription filled with heather and hawks, then came back here and packed.

now i'm off to camp!!! yay!!!!!!

i'm leaving around 6:15 or so to go work in the kitchen at camp for the ladies' retreat. :)
i'll be back sometime sunday late afternoon/early evening.
feel free to send me email to the camp address! just put 'tracey' in the subject line, and they'll print it out and give it to me.

campluz@zoominternet.net

:)

[here]
Created by jess and taken 1977 times on bzoink!
What time do you get up?	either 8 or 10:30, depending on the day
How do you get to school?	i walk around campus
If you knew you were dying tomorrow, who would you say your goodbyes to 1st	my family
Easiest class?	9 on mwf
What month is your birthday?	april
How old were you when you got your first kiss?	18
How old were you when you started high school?	14
Are you hooked on the internet?	yes
Do you like going to school?	sometimes
Are you a morning person?	definitely not
When's the last time you had a b/f or g/f?	a couple weeks ago...
Do you play any instruments?	yes
If so, what?	clarinet
What's your favorite season?	spring
What's the name of your best friend?	i don't really have one :(
Rather be too hot or too cold?	cold
Cats or dogs?	cats
How many blankets do you sleep with?	3 or 4
What are your parents' names?	bob and lynn
Do you have a crush?	no
How long have you had a crush on this person?	---
Do you practice a religion?	i practice following Christ
If you saw Brittney Spears somewhere, what would you do?	run far far away
If you saw Pres. Bush somewhere, what would you do?	give him a hug... lol i don't know
Do you have a secret you've never told anyone?	yes
Do you have a secret you've only told one or two people?	yes
Who do you trust to keep your most important secrets?	my journal
Do you tell your parents everything?	no
Do you think your parents are nice people at heart?	yes
Do you have a relative that you really do not get along with?	yes [don't we all?]
Create a Survey Search Surveys Go to bzoink!

yay for always being behind!


monday was a long time ago. i don't really remember it. oh my mom came for dinner that day! i had 2 boxes in here that i didn't have any room for at all, so she came out and got them and took them home. she also brought me my music camp dvd, so i was happy. :)

tuesday... hmmm.... not remembering anything special that happened on tuesday. well walking for health was a good time, as always. ;) my walking buddies make it a good time, anyway. oh!! and tuesday was jessie's birthday, so our whole suite [minus chrissy] went to cold stone for some ice cream. yum!! :) theeeeeeeeen..... THE SEASON PREMIERES OF GILMORE GIRLS AND ONE TREE HILL!!! i watched both. i was glued to the tv for 2 hours. it was amazing... :)

wednesday... ummm.... went to walmart, panera, and smoothie king with lydia, picked up some applications, then later that night jessie, kim, and i went to the 9:45 show of little black book at movies 4. i still can't decide if i liked it or not...

yesterday... i only had one class, and it was a test. we had our commons group discussion at 11:30, then heat[h]er and i called our field experience place, but the lady we needed to talk to wasn't there. so we called back around 3:30, and were informed that a person has to be at least 21 to work at safe landing.... she said she'd check and call us back. we called ken and told him, and then the lady never called us back.... it was nice.
last night davis [mike davis] and lyle came over for awhile. it was fun to hang out with davis, i've missed him. then we went over to reno's room and watched gi joe movies off of ebaums... haha. then my roomie came over, and reno broke out the ddr pad. heather took care of the down and left arrows, and i did the up and right arrows, and we collectively played DDR. it was hilarious. heather did one on her own, too. but i didn't, not with that many people in the room.
after roomie and i left their room, we went out on the hill behind the cafeteria, laid down, and looked at the stars and talked for like half an hour. it was a good time. i love looking at the stars. it was a kinda cloudy night, but there was a patch without clouds right above us.
then i came back here and studied for my bio test, but something happened [i don't even understand what....] and then i couldn't concentrate on my studying anymore. so i went to bed around 2:30.

today i got up at 8. i took my bio test at 9, and it was ok. i'm hoping for a C... then i took a shower. now i'm doing nothing. well i'm listening to a new rk song. :) then i'm gonna go to intro to swk, sign language, then davis and i are going to lunch, either at chipotle [GROSS] or sheetz. then i'll be around until 6:15 or so, then I'M GONNA LEAVE FOR A WEEKEND AT CAMP!!!! i need a break so much right now...

lets get caught back up...

i shaved a chunk of skin off my leg while shaving on saturday night, that was a good time... it bled for a good 20 minutes. fun times.... lol

sunday i got up, got ready for church, then went with KT, kim, and lydia. lyle sat with us. it was good, i like first mennonite. after the service, lyle left, and the rest of us stayed for sunday school. the class was ok, but we went to the adult class cuz there's no college class. then we stayed for the carry-in meal. :) it was good stuff.
sunday afternoon i procrastinated a lot on my paper. i watched a lot of movies on abc family, played donkey kong a bit, called my rochelle, and basically did nothing for awhile. lol. then i took a disk and went in kim and rachel's room to write my paper (while taping singin in the rain on tcm, yay!!) since i couldn't concentrate in here. that worked well, and it didn't take me long to write my paper. so i went out in the living room and laid down on the couch to watch the last 45 minutes or so of singin in the rain, and the next thing i know, the movie is over and i had been asleep for half an hour.... lol. then we watched 'celeste in the city' ("we" being me, kim, rachel, jessie, and heather after she got back from golf). i love that movie. i love abc family movies in general. they're my favorite. :) i think i just hung around after that, not doing much. i watched an andrew lloyd webber special on pbs from 11pm-1am. it was amazing. tony vincent (who plays simon peter in the newer movie of JCS) sang a song as judas, and wow.... AMAZING, i think i'm in love. <3 then i went to bed.

i'll finish after class. i have lit in society, then walking for health... oh the joy....

friday i lost my work study [or rather, found out i never had it in the first place...], cried a lot, went to classes, hung out and did nothing, played dutch blitz with kim, jessie, and jessie's sister jen, went to starbucks with kelli [yay!], hung out with kelli for awhile, ali came, ali cut my hair [and she did it outside at night and couldn't see well, and now its short and i don't like it, but when do i ever like my hair??], then they left and heather and i watched kung pow [wow... that was a really STUPID movie.... lol] and then i did nothing and then i watched extreme days with jessie and her sister. then i was gonna go to bed, and joe IMed me and told me what not to wear was on, so then i stayed up till 2 to watch that. then i went to bed

today: my mom called at 8:20 to tell me tim's cross country meet started at 9, but i didn't get out of bed. i just listened to her leave the message and then went back to sleep. then i woke up at 10 when heather's alarm went off, and realized that i'd SLEPT IN, cuz i didn't set my alarm last night. so i threw on some clothes and went out to where the CC meet was, to find out that not only had i missed division III boys running, leetonia had already left. :( :( :( :( i'd been talking about this meet and how excited i was to see my little brother for a few weeks. i told like everyone. and then i missed it. :( i ate lunch with brit, her brother, and a friend of his, then i came back here. i was going to start my paper, but i never did. ali came over around 4:45 or so, and we played diddy kong until like 5:20, and then left for kelli's. kelli's mommy made us steak and potatoes for dinner.... oh it was yummy. mmmmmmmmmmmm. :) then they brought me back here and i did nothing. i was so extremely bored. then heather and i headed over to heritage to hang out with her friend brett. we watched dumb and dumber and i crocheted. and talked to ermine for a bit. then i went to sheetz with heather, brett, reno, and dinky [??? i don't know... i think thats what he said, lol]. it was a good time. :)

now i'm gonna go shower, then get to bed. i'm going to first mennonite again with KT. kim and lydia are coming with us. lyle is going too, and maybe roger. :)

on the way back from that, they were flipping through songs on a cd, and 'only one' came on. i couldn't exactly be like "no we can't listen to this song". so i sat through it, and just looked out the window so no one could see that i was trying my hardest [and pretty much failing] not to cry. will i ever be better? every time i think i'm ok, i hear a song or something, and i crash down again. i wish that i was stronger. but i'm not. i'm weak, and i don't know how to deal with things on my own. i guess i'll learn tho...

stole this from christy

1) Single or Taken: single
2) Sex: female
3) Birthday: april 15
4) Sign: aries
5) Siblings: rusty [22] and tim [15]
6) Hair color: brown
7) Eye color: brown
8) height: 5'8 or so

*-;-* R e l a t i o n s h i p s~*
1) Who are your best friends?: i don't think i have one right now... :(
2) Do you have a boyfriend/girlfriend?: no
3) Did you send this to your crush: its being posted for all to see
4) Did your crush send this to you: i got it from christy's journal

*-;-*F a s h i o n S t u f f *-;-*
1) Where is your favorite place to shop: VDO and jc penney
2) Any tattoos or piercing: eyebrow

*-;-* T h e E x t r a S t u f f *-;-*
1) Do you do drugs: not even my prescription, cuz i can't afford it
2) What kind of shampoo do you use: at the moment, its something tangerine. i think its... i don't even remember
3) What are you most scared of: being alone
4) What are you listening to right now: jessie and her sister are watching 'the prince and me' out in the living room, and i can half-way hear it
5) What is your dream car: don't care
6) Who was the last person to call you: ali to tell me she was on her way
7) Where do you want to get married: don't know, cuz i don't go to the same church that i used to when i was little, but don't know a lot of people at the one that i go to now... maybe i'll just go to vegas ;)
8) How many messenger buddies do you have right now: 199
9) If you could change anything about yourself, what would it be: everything

*-;-* F a v o r I t e s *-;-*
1) Color: orange
2) Dessert: i don't know
4) Boy's names: don't know yet
5) Girls names: don't know yet
6) Subjects in school: sign language is hard, but a lot of fun so far
7) Animals: pigs
8) Sports: don't really care for sports
9) Pet peeve: when the toilet paper in our bathroom is on the wrong way

*-;-* H a v e Y o u E v e r *-;-*
1) Smoked: no
2) Given anyone a bath: my dog
3) Bungee jumped: no
4) Broken a law: driving laws [but i've never been caught... :)]
5) Made yourself throw-up: no
6) Gone skinny-dipping: haha
7) Been in love: yes

*-;-* F i r s t T h i n g T h a t C o m e s T o M i n d *-;-*
1) Red: green
2) Cow tipping: christy [is that normal that i think of her when i read cow tipping??? lol]
3) Socks: toes
4) Greenland: iceland

*~-;-~*W h a t ' s W o r s e ?*~-;-~*
1) Barfing on your date or your date barfing on you: my date barfing on me

*-;-* F i n a l Q u e s t i o n s *-;-*
1) Do you like filling these out: whatever
2) How many people are you sending this to: posting it in my journal
3) Who will send it back: probly no one
4) Gold or Silver: silver
6) What is the last film you saw at the cinema: cinderella story on wednesday with my roommate and my favorite non best friend
7) Favorite Cartoon Character: don't know
8) What did you have for breakfast: i didn't
9) Who would you hate being locked in a room with: chow mein charlie!!

so i forgot to set my alarm last night. i woke up at 10, got dressed real quick, and went outside. then i found out that division III boys had already run. i slept through tim running. i couldn't even find leetonia... :( i really wanted to be there.


at least i got to see everrett....

when i said it was going to be a bad day, i didn't realize that i was sentencing myself....

i just lost my work study job, because my dad didn't turn in my FAFSA on time....

why can't i be like the rich kids?
so i might not be able to stay at malone....

i feel like everything's crashing down on me at once. it's not a fun feeling. i hate feeling like my world is spinning out of control, and i'm just doing my best to hang on and not fall. well i think i just fell. i can't do this anymore, i'm tired of everything going wrong. do i ever get to be happy? when will things actually go RIGHT for me?

i'm behind again...

yesterday... hmmm... it was tuesday... i got up, went to commons 1, ate lunch with brittany, made plans with her for a road trip (yay!!!!!!!!) to kentucky christian college in a few weekends, went to lit in society, went to walking and walked with my 'walking buddies' kirstin and jessica, worked 5-7, watched gilmore girls and one tree hill, went up to latenight, talked to kurt williams [yeah leetonia kids at malone!!! lol] and i forget if i did anything after that... i don't think i did. maybe i did? who knows.... lol

today i went to bio, pretty much failed the quiz, chapel, talked to old RA, got my yearbook, got a letter (yay!!!!!!!!!) from travis, opened it at the beginning of my intro class and proceeded to cry, went to sign language and had fun, as usual, listened to my answering machine message from rochelle, ate lunch, went to social sciences and didn't understand a single thing [but had fun messing around the whole class.... lol], went to target with chrissy, ate dinner, organized my stuff more via stuff i bought at target, went and saw a cinderella story [GOOD movie!!] with my favorite non-best friend brittany and my roommate, talked to my mom for a bit on the phone, went to muggswigz with matt, reno, joe, and john, went up to sarah and jenny's for a bit, hung out in chelsie, berta, maggie, and charity's room for awhile, made plans to eat breakfast at 9 [yikes!!!] with chelsie, read for my commons group meeting tomorrow, and now i'm heading to bed.... yay sleep! [i think a nap will be in order for tomorrow, seeing how i'm used to sleeping in till 11 on thursdays... lol]


current favorite song: first day of the rest of my life by mxpx

i realized something just now.... travis is leaving in a day and a half.

Tmanlivin4God: hey tracey
Tmanlivin4God: 1 and a half
relientkbandgeek: wow....
Tmanlivin4God: i know
relientkbandgeek: so are you excited??
Tmanlivin4God: it's freaky
Tmanlivin4God: yes and nervous
Tmanlivin4God: kinda unsure about leaving everybody
relientkbandgeek: yeah that would be hard for me
Tmanlivin4God: yeah it is
relientkbandgeek: but a lot of people are going with you
relientkbandgeek: so thats cool
Tmanlivin4God: yeah
Tmanlivin4God: that is true !
Tmanlivin4God: and your not coming
relientkbandgeek: :-(
relientkbandgeek: no
relientkbandgeek: i'm the one being left behind
relientkbandgeek: you guys'll come back and be like "tracey who????"
Tmanlivin4God: tracey who yoder
Tmanlivin4God: thats your middle name

wednesday he gets on plane, flies to germany, and stays there for 7 months. travis...the person who's pretty much been my closest friend this past year. the person that i go to with pretty much every problem. yeah he's leaving... i'm so excited for him, its gonna be awesome. but he's leaving... i guess i'm just terrified of being left behind. he's going to germany with ben, paul, brian, and i don't even know who else. they're gonna have amazing experiences, and i'm just afraid that i'm going to be forgotten in the meantime.

i just have to hold on to thoughts such as this...
Tmanlivin4God: well then you should know, close friends don't forget each other

its just gonna be hard... i can't believe they're leaving on wednesday!!

so i'm gonna get back into actually posting in this thing... i basically haven't since i've been back at school. things have been crazy.

this past saturday i headed down to mount vernon nazarene university with reno and joe [aka gnome]. it was a good time. i hung out with ali and becca most of the time i was there. i didn't hang out with travis as much as i would have liked [seeing how he's leaving for germany in 2 days], but i still got to see him for a bit, which was cool. 2B and tim were there too. i heart my friends. :)
we got there while subseven was playing, and i didn't go listen to them at all. i did watch kids in the way, however, and i really like them. staple i'm not a huge fan of, but i watched most of the concert. i ended up running around doing random things during the swift, and only caught their last few songs. i really wish i had stayed to hear more, cuz they were amazing from what i heard. i ended up going back up front for everyday sunday, and they were really good too. then i stayed up front for the elms and pillar, the 2 bands that i was actually there to see. they were both good. the crowd at pillar made me sad, but other than that it was a good concert.
afterwards, reno joe and i headed back here. on the way i managed to run over one live animal and one pre-dead one and hit a few bugs, but i did avoid the deer, lol. we stopped at IHOP in massillon and ate, then came back here. i went to bed pretty much right away, cuz i was tired.

yesterday KT and i headed out to first mennonite here in canton for church. it was brian's last sunday in the US, and we wanted to see him. we both really liked it. we're gonna go again next sunday [although the carry-in meal they're having might have something to do with that... haha]. after church and sunday school, jean [brian's mom] invited us to their house for pizza and to hang out, so we went and hung out with brian, lee martin, and sylvia hooley. it was a good time. lee caught a ride back to malone with me and KT. he's a funny guy.
after that i just kinda hung out. i watched about 2 and a half hours of saved by the bell cuz i really wanted to get it finished, lol. so now i've watched the entire first 2 seasons of saved by the bell. :) then jessie, kim, heather, and i watched peter pan. the old school one with mary martin. it was a good time. :) then i did my social sciences homework for like 2 HOURS... NOT a good time... it was so horrible. then i went to bed.

today i got up, got dressed, went to human bio, went to chapel, read for intro all during chapel, went to intro, went to sign langauge, ate lunch with heat[h]er and chrissy, lindsay and i gave heat[h]er and melissa the 'abnormal children' award, then i hung out with them in heat[h]er and melissa's room for awhile.

now i'm on the phone with my mom

mat gave ali his password to his xanga tonight. ali proceeded to change his password, give the new one to me, then she changed the colors and wrote a new post. i changed the picture. oh its a good one...

today i went out to my car and got the clear shoe box out of my trunk, and then i brought it in here and i put things in it. everything that i looked at that made my eyes well up when i looked at it got put in that box.

its a good thing to do, but it just makes it feel so final. like maybe it was all just pretend, or a bad dream, until now. now i look around and the pictures are gone, and his phone number isn't taped to the side of my computer anymore. the card he gave me last week isn't sitting on my desk, and i threw away the empty bag of sour patch kids thats been sitting on my printer [that bag came with the card, i found them in my bookbag in the middle of a class].
i think one of the hardest things will be my room at home. there's a lot of stuff that i didn't bring with me, and i'm not looking forward to being in my room back home anytime soon.

off to dinner [and hopefully some laughter] with molly, jenny, and sarah!

yayayay!!! my little brother is so awesome!!! he got his picture in the paper back home for cross country!! check it out!!!

lydia roberts is the coolest person EVER!!!!!!!! she's so cool. she has my phone right now, cuz she wanted one with an answering machine. that makes her even cooler, since she has my phone. she's so cool... :)

just to recap, this was my roomie last year, caryn. she was crazy. :)



this is the guy that i'm dating. i've been dating him since january. isn't he a winner? ;)



i worked at mcdonalds for about 3 weeks at the beginning of the summer, and 2 and a half weeks at the end of the summer. its not a fun job, but people like my shanny make it ok! :)



this is just a picture of me and my cool little brother, just cuz. he's so cool. :)



one time, i don't remember when, but one time this summer i went to el campesino's with melanie, ali, david, and janson [he's taking the picture]. it was fun. we saw the hershbergers there. :)



tim was in craig's cabin at youth camp. as you can see, that was quite the combination. the guys in that cabin were insane. i mean, g's, they lit their butts on fire!!!



this is my AMAZING jr. teen cabin. we're so cool. look how buff we are!! this was before the God's Hollow hike. go us. :)



this was my jr. high cabin. i was supposed to counsel them alone, but then i ended up counseling with elizabeth [the girl on the bottom, lol] and it was an awesome week. even if they did plot against us constantly!!!



i got to spend a weekend in virginia with SARAH!! :) it was AWESOME!!! oh goodness i loved the mountains a lot. :) it was so much fun!!!



yeah cooking!!! i spent the weekend at brian schlabach's house with erin gotwals, and we made/served an amazing meal of chicken stir fry and rice, garlic bread, watermelon, carrot cake [with cream cheese icing, of course], and iced tea. it was so good, and we had a blast making it. :)

[i feel like a tour guide or something, lol]



during music camp, rochelle and i read sense and sensibility outloud. it was great. then we watched the movie together a few weeks later. the book was much better, but the movie was really good too :)




becca and donna shaving creamed my car---while i was in it. i took some pictures before i washed my car, lol.



i got even. check out becca's car. oh yeah. that was me. :)



i have a few pictures from the staff reunion at the end of the summer [well i have a lot more, but these are the ones i took the time to scan and put on my computer, lol]. here they are...

me and kt



see no, hear no, speak no. :)
lacey, holley, and me


this last one is my favorite. its great. i have another one that has kirk's head in the bottom left corner, but he blocks a few other people, so i scanned this one...

i think we might have broken the weight limit in the pug... haha :)
i love these people. they were my family over the summer. they are awesome. :)


so maybe you didn't care about any of this, but i thought it was fun. :)

i think i've posted this song in here before, but man... it still amazes me.

Pitiful by Blindside

As I recall with my stomach turning
I was hiding away from myself, away from You
Like nothing, though something was terribly wrong
And I admit that I was only waiting for the right time
Night time, the right moment for You to look away
Though You never did, I pretended for a while
So I could walk where I don't belong

And I remember every word You said
Come back in time, come back
And I remember I would soon be dead
Now so pitiful, so pitiful

But I know as I hammered those nails into Your beautiful hands
Your eyes still try to search for mine, but I look away
Now Your eyes are the only thing that can save me
I'm still so afraid of them piercing
You're breaking into my prison
Just pretended for a while
My soul is dying
I won't look away

And I remember every word You said...
I'll remember every word You said
This time I won't look away

check it out. download it. IM me, and i'll send it to you. its so amazing...